...busting up my brains for the words

Sunday, January 22, 2006

That sticky iran problem

Yes, you know what I'm talking about. The problem is how to pronounce the name of the leader, Ahmadinejad. I've heard Hugh Hewitt proclaim that no one knows how to pronounce this name. And a lot of folks don't. But I've settled on a pronunciation that I've noticed most people seem to be gravitating to.
First of all, any word or name, no matter long and difficult it seems to appear, can be easily pronounced if you break it down into segments, or syllables. Then, one must decide which syllable to stress as being the stronger.

I've decided that this name should look like this; Ahma DEEN e jod.

Say it. Rolls off the tongue once you've made up your mind, doesn't it? Now, all that's left is to secure confidence in this pronunciation. Make a little sing song with it to cement that confidence. Like this;

Ahma DEEN e jod.
Ahma DEEN e jod.
Ahma DEEN e jod is an Iranian clod.

Good. You've got it. And remember this; even if this pronunciation isn't perfect, if you say it with confidence, everyone else will be impressed and believe you know how. And who the heck are they to argue with you?

Okay. Now for that other sticky Iranian problem...the nukes. I'm no military or world order expert, but I've been sampling the many opinions in the blogosphere. And it seems to me that the worst thing we could do is nothing...allowing Iran to go nuclear and blackmail the world or share nukes with terrorists. So we have to do something.

And so it seems that there are basically three camps of thought on this;
1) Continue diplomacy
2) Launch air strikes
3) Invade

All of these choices are dicey and fearsome for the world. Continuing diplomacy in hopes of an internal uprising is dangerous because it allows Iran to continue to buy time. The remaining two choices are obviously dangerous, as well, for their own reasons. I can only hope that the US Special Operations might have some secret aces up its sleeve in order to bring about an internal coup in Iran to energize the young populace there that hates the mullahs and supports the US. I believe that's what Donald Rumsfeld's military emphasis has been all along since he took the job as Secretary of Defense.

But falling short of any Special Ops wizbang miracle, I feel that we should not shrink from the dirty but necessary job of invading this member of the Axis of Evil if necessary to keep the region safe from Iran's nuclear ambitions. We are very well positioned for an invasion, as our forces are already heavily positioned on both sides of Iran. It seems to me that once we display a firm will to invade, Iran will be forced to recognise that brinkmanship can only result in their own destruction.

All my years of playing Risk have taught me a thing or two about strategy. But sadly, this is no game.


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